I don’t know where to start…
There are some many things I want to share at the moment about my Second Life.
So many of you may realize my sudden disappearance from SL and ask a simple question WHY?…
The reason can be explained in 2 words:
REAL LIFE
A while ago everything was just amazing in SL at least for me with my lovely MUVEnation family and great friends everywhere in SL. I was working in Surrey Island, studying in MUVEnation, having conferences in Idaho and showing off in Emerge runway.
But all these things went down with a simple problem: “slow internet speed”.
Actually everything wasn’t that simple. I had to physically move within 3 counties, move my house twice, and face the fact that where I am standing right now there is not internet higher than 512 which is not even reliable…
It’s just funny, how a simple thing can destroy whatever you work for it so hard, isn’t it….
Three days ago, for a second I felt 0.01% of what disable people feel in their everyday life when I couldn’t move myself because of the low internet connection. It was awful.
That day I had a meeting with StevenW and Paz, so that they could help me catch up with whatever I was missing. I was standing there, willing to move, to talk, to fly and most of all to CREATE but I could not even walk, my texts were not being shown in the local chat and everything was gray. I was trapped in my own virtual body and real mind.
The feeling was so real that I was CRYING in Real Life, realizing that my brain is disconnected from my SL body…. no matter what I wish to do, they will just stays in my brain, and my body and environment is not functioning based on my commands.
So I can loudly announce that: I AM VIRTUALLY DISABLED
I created this term to describe my current situation. It is important to mention here, I person in SL is either all right or has combination of disabilities that puts too many emotional pressures on the person. When someone is visually disabled he/she is unable to see things in the right way, unable to walk and fly properly, unable to communicate with others. But for me none of them is as bad as being unable to create, to rez objects, write scripts to make something amazing.
Not many people might exactly feel what I am feeling now and many more will consider it as stupid expression. But, I’m sure those of you that have been around long enough to have your own Virtual Identity can understand me and feel my frustrations and emotions.
Considering it bad luck, destiny or whatever; this is a situation which I have to deal with for a while and hopefully it will not cost me my MUVEnation course. But, what I learnt from it is the new concept of “being virtually disabled” which I would never be able to find it otherwise.
